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Niall’s POV

June 11, 1998

“Greg, I’m scared”. I clung to him as we followed Mrs Randy inside. She has found Greg and I hiding from the others, hoping to get more help time but we had gotten caught. 

“I know Nialler. It’ll be okay”. We followed her to our small room with the two old beds and old, dirty sheets. 

“What’s she going to do to us?” 

“Beds”. I looked up to Greg in fear. “NOW!” We climbed on our beds and I lay on my back. “Top off”. I pulled mine off. “On our stomach!” I looked to Greg in fear and he turned to lie on his stomach. I did the same and heard a loud whack and Greg scream. I clenched my eyes closed, holding the sheets between my fingers as I felt a blinding sting come from my back. I screamed and it appeared again. “You deserve this!” Again. “You boys have been very naughty. No wonder your parents abandoned you!” Greg screamed seconds later and I felt the sting again. “Stupid boys!” I sobbed as she continued to hit us with the belt for another five minutes. “You deserved it”. She walked out the room and I cried loudly in pain. 

“Nialler calm down. It’s okay. You’re okay”. Greg lifted me carefully and hugged me. “It’s going to  be okay”. 

“I-it hurts Greg”.

“Shh, I know. I know but the pain goes away okay?” I looked up to him.

“How do you know!?” He sighed and turned around, showing the bloody rips in his skin but underneath them, there were scars. 

“I’ve gotten this before”. He turned back to face me. “It’ll go away, okay? The pain will go away”. 

“When did they start?”

“When I was your age”.

“You were five too?” He nodded. “Why do they hate us so much Greg?”

“I don’t know Ni”. 

“Why wont anyone adopt me?”

“I honestly don't know. But we’re in this together, okay?” I nodded. 

“Stop complaining you little shits!” *whack*

I jumped up, breathing heavily as I searched the bed to find it completely empty. 

“Harry? Harry!?” I let tears fall as I desperately searched the room with my eyes. “HARRY!?”

“What? Are you okay!? What’s wrong?” Harry came rushing from the bathroom and to the bed. 

“Harry”. He pulled me to him and held me tightly.

“What happened?” I clung to his top tightly and soaked it with my tears. “What is it?”

“I…I was five and…belt…Greg”

“Was it a memory?” I nodded and he lightly rubbed my back. I flinched slightly. “Shit Ni. Did I trigger it?” I shook my head, not wanting him to feel bad. 

“No, it’s okay just….just hold me”. He pushed his fingers through my hair and I listened to his heart beating and his steady breathing. 

“Who’s Greg?”

“He was my friend”. 

“Tell me about him?” I nodded and cuddled more into him. 

“I cant remember how and when I met him, but we shared a room. It wasn't great hospitality. The beds were rusty and old, and the sheets were dirty. Greg was so nice to me. He took care of me. I always felt this connection with him. I don't know what it was exactly. I still don't know. He was there when they started to whip me. He told me the pain goes away. I was five when it started. It still scares me. I don't like to talk about my past, but with you, I want to share every single experience I've ever had. I want you to know everything. When I was eight and Greg was twelve, he got adopted. They were nice people. I’m not complaining. But after I felt I could never have anyone again. Then I met Matt. He was so sweet to me. I was fourteen at the time and I…He took me on a date and…He said he cared about me. So, I gave myself to him. It was my first time. He was quite rough. But I thought he liked me. The next day at school, he told me it wouldn't work”.

“Oh my god Ni”.

“It really hurt. I thought he really cared about me. This happened again, and maybe another four times after that. I was so stupid! I don't know what I was ever thinking. The lady would continue to hit me until I turned eighteen and had gotten this house. I was finally free. But then the agoraphobia kicked in. I just thought of every bad situation possible. Every time I even just step outside I begin to panic, think of all circumstances. I went to see a psychologist a year ago and told her how I felt and she told me I had agoraphobia. I didn't want to have anything. I didn't want to be an agoraphobe. I mean, who would? But I decided to never leave my house. I didn’t want to go outside. I hated it. But before I would, I wouldn't think about it too much. I didn't think about what I was doing. It pains me Harry”. I look up to him to see he had a few tears running down his cheeks.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that”. I wiped away his tears. 

“You got beaten by your father Haz”. He shook his head. 

“That’s not the same. You were tortured for almost fourteen years Ni. Nothing can be worse than that”.

“But now I have an ugly body?” He traced his fingers along my back lightly, causing me to shiver. 

“You don't have an ugly body. I love your body. Do you know what these scars show me?” I shook my head. “They show me how strong you are”.

“I love you” He smiled goofily and kissed me softly. 

“And I love you”. I hummed and kissed him again. “When is your birthday?”

“September thirteen”.

“That’s in two days!” I shrugged. “Niall why didn't you tell me?”

“No one had ever cared enough to know”.

“Well now I do”.

“Haz, please don't make a big deal about this?”

“I’m your boyfriend, it’s my job”. He kissed along my back and nibbled on my earlobe, making me moan slightly. “Mine”. He growled and began to move his hand towards my pants. 

“Haz, no”. He whined. 

“Why not?”

“We will okay? Just not yet. I don't want to rush into things”.

“You’re so caring and responsible”.

“Isnt that a good thing?”

“Oh..I don't know…” I lightly hit him and he laughed. “I love you baby. No matter what”.

“I love you too sap” He gasped in fake shock. 

“Sap!?”

“You’ve told me you love me five times already today”.

“That’s because I do love you”.

“Well I love you more”. He kissed my temple. 

“Not possible Ni”.

———————————————

HIIIII!!

ITS LOUIS’ 23RD HERE IN LIKE 3 HOURS NOW AND IM HERE LIKE NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO HE CANT BE FUCKING 23 HES MY BABY NO

ANYWAY THAT ALSO MEANS ITS CHRISTMAS EVE TOMORROW AND THEN CHRISTMAS DAY SO DUNNO WHEN UPDATING NEXT…

MERRY CHRISTMAS GUYS !! XXXX

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