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Okay I don't know what the hell this chapter is honestly. I'm not sure how I feel about it but I hope you like it anyways.

Please let me know if I've made any spelling or grammatical errors.

If you enjoyed, please comment and vote because it makes me excited to keep writing. :) - Vanessa

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Ashton winced at the pain in his eyes. His eyelashes fluttered open and it hurt. He felt them watering in irritation and he tried to wipe at them but it only made it worse. To top it off, Ashton's head was in excruciating pain. It felt as though it was pounding and he winced with every throb.

He felt a warm rise and fall beneath his head and he was confused. He didn't understand where he was or what he was lying on.

He sat up, rubbing his eyes as they continued to water in pain and his head ached severely. He let his hand roam around, trying to feel the surrounding area for an indication of what was happening.

He felt the warm skin of a torso and blushed profusely, his heart stuttering because why was he in bed with someone? The last think he remembered was going to the party and what if he slept with someone?

He started panicking but he didn't know what to do and his breathing increased as his panic did.

"Ash?" A groggy voice asked and Ashton didn't know if he was more relieved, shocked or confused to hear Luke's voice. He also flushed a little because Luke was almost naked and he'd been lying on top of him. His morning voice also did nothing to help lessen Ashton's flush.

"Luke? What's going on? Where am I?" Ashton could hear the panic in his own voice and he rubbed at his eyes again because it really hurt. His throbbing head continued its dull ache and he was just so confused.

He heard soft rustling before a hand came to rub gently on Ashton's back.

"You don't remember last night?" Luke whispered, his voice close and soothing and it helped calm him down. He shook his head, rubbing his eyes again.

"I remember going to a party with Brad and I had a drink but I don't understand. My head hurts and my mouth tastes funny like I have a hangover but I only had one drink." Ashton frowned, lips jutting out in a small pout as he tried to remember the events after that. Luke sighed next to him and it made Ashton more puzzled.

"Someone spiked your drink, Ash," Luke mumbled, voice sounding pained. Ashton felt his heart drop, a feeling of nauseous washing over him.

"W-What?" Ashton stuttered.

"Yeah, baby. You called Michael's phone last night while we were both sleeping and I answered it for him. I could barely understand what you were saying but it sounded like you were crying and you sounded so scared. I could hear your panic and- God I was so fucking scared! I didn't know what was happening," Luke's voice died down and Ashton was terrified, wanting to know what happened while collectively hoping he'd never find out.

"What happened?" Ashton whispered, voice barely audible.

"When-when Michael, Calum and I got there... there was a girl and she was on top of you," Luke's voice sounded so pained and it made everything so much worse. He hated to ask so bluntly but he needed to know.

"Did she r-rape me?" He chocked out. His eyes were watering from more than how irritated they felt.

"No," Luke said strongly. "It didn't get that far. She didn't touch you, not properly at least. Maybe through your jeans but when I got there they were still on."

Ashton nodded, processing it. No matter how unpleasant it sounded, he felt better knowing it didn't go any further. It also helped that he didn't remember it because he's sure that if he did he would be completely freaking out.

He tried to figure out how he got here because these sheets didn't feel like his own. They were far more soft and he wanted to lie there for a while. Ashton wracked his brain to remember and he vaguely remembered asking Luke to stay and asking to cuddle. He blushed when he remembered because he knew he'd probably be too embarrassed to ask if he was completely coherent.

Ashton smiled a little when he remembered Luke singing to him. He couldn't remember the lyrics exactly but he remembers thinking they were beautiful. Maybe he'd ask Luke to sing it to him again.

He rubbed at his eyes again, wincing when they watered even more, spilling over.

"Baby, are you okay?" Luke asked panicked. Ashton nodded a little but decided against it when his eyes stung and his head gave a particularly painful throb.

"My eyes hurt," he mumbled, rubbing them again.

"Here, let me see. Don't rub them, Ash." Ashton felt warm hands cupping his cheeks and he blushed because they were so close and Luke was clearly looking at his eyes.

"You have contact lenses on," Luke said, frown evident in his voice. "Why do you have them on?"

"Brad gave them to me so I would look normal," Ashton muttered, letting his head drop a little in shame. Luke's hand immediately left his cheek, however, to lift his head back up.

"Your eyes are perfect, baby. Don't listen to Brad, not for a second okay?" Luke whispered. And maybe Ashton could smell a bit of Luke's morning breath because of how close he was but it wasn't too bad and Ashton didn't mind because it was Luke. He nodded, even though he didn't completely agree with him.

"Can- can you help me take them out?" Ashton pleaded. "It hurts so bad."

"Okay. Just stay still for me, yeah?" Ashton nodded and opened his eyes wider. Luke tilted his head up and his finger touched down on the contact lens on his right eyes. He winced because it hurt but he tried to keep his eyes from shutting instinctively.

He sighed in relief when Luke removed the one on his right eye. His eyes watered so much they spilt over and down his cheeks. He blinked repeatedly to try get them to go away.

"It'll feel better when I take the other one out, just hold still for a minute more," Luke mumbled, voice laced with concentration. Ashton shuffled a little before sitting perfectly still and widening his eyes again. Luke finally took it out and Ashton sighed and he blinked the water from his eyes. He rubbed them furiously but Luke's hands quickly came up to grab his wrists.

"Stop, baby. You'll hurt yourself," Luke whispered in his ear. Ashton felt his own face press against Luke's shoulder and he shakily agreed because Luke's bare chest was pressed up against him even if he did have his own shirt on and couldn't feel him exactly, it still made his cheeks tint pink.

"Don't you have a lecture today?" Ashton asked because he really wanted to spend a little more time with Luke.

"It's at night," Luke said. Ashton heard the smile in his voice and couldn't help but smile in return, even if it was lost in Luke's shoulder.

"Can we lie back down?" Ashton asked timidly and Luke chuckled fondly as he lay back down, gripping Ashton's waist as he pulled him on top. Ashton squirmed nervously and Luke only chuckled again.

"You look so cute in the morning, baby," Luke whispered as he brushed his fingers through Ashton's hair. Ashton nuzzled his face into Luke's bare chest in embarrassment then realised what he was doing and stopped. Luke snorted in amusement and Ashton only flushed in mortification because apparently he doesn't know how to act normal around Luke.

"You straightened your hair. Why? Not that I don't like it like this, because you look beautiful either way. I'm just wondering," Luke mumbled, his fingers continuing their motion in his hair.

"Brad said I'd look better with straight hair," Ashton confessed leaning into Luke's touch. Luke's movement stopped and Ashton involuntarily whined at the loss.

"You know, this Brad is really starting to piss me off," Luke muttered darkly. "He made you go to the party, didn't he?"

"He didn't make me, Luke. He just said that if I wanted to be normal-"

"You're not normal," Luke sighed. Ashton's heart clenched painfully at Luke's blunt words.

"W-what?" Ashton whispered.

"I don't mean it in a bad way, I'm just being honest. Majority of the population can see and you can't, so no, you're not normal. Did you know blue eyes are a mutation? Everyone loves blue eyes but they aren't normal either. My point is that the things that make people different- the things that make people 'not normal' are what make them beautifully different." Ashton listened to Luke's words and found himself nodding slowly.

"So, are you saying that no one is normal?" Ashton voiced his thoughts as Luke continued to card his fingers through Ashton's hair.

"Yeah. You need to stop trying to be other people's differences. Maybe you don't like curly hair but maybe people with straight hair don't like their hair straight. We all have things about ourselves we want to change but we are who we are and we need to accept our differences," Luke mumbled, voice muffled against Ashton's head.

Ashton felt his eyes water at Luke's words because for once in his life he felt okay, like maybe being different wasn't the worst thing in the world.

"Thank you," Ashton whispered.

"No problem," Luke replied, placing a kiss to Ashton's head. "Can you face me, baby?" Luke asked. Ashton shifted uncomfortably because he didn't like when people stared at him, especially so closely because he didn't know what imperfections he had. He could have a giant zit on his forehead and he wouldn't know.

He reluctantly agreed, however, and slowly tilted his head so that he was hopefully facing Luke. He felt fingers caress his cheek and he blushed at the contact, his eyelids fluttering at the gentle touch.

Luke's hand trailed down his side and back, fingers tracing light patterns and Ashton shivered at the touch. His breath sighed out at the feeling and his eyes closed contently.

Luke chuckled at Ashton's reaction. "That feel nice?" He asked smugly and Ashton just mumbled a yes because it really did. Luke's fingers were barely touching his back and sides but it made his breathing increase a little because it really did feel nice.

"I wish you could see how beautiful you look right now," Luke mumbled. "Eyes closed, pink cheeks with your mouth parted like that. God," Luke breathed. Ashton swallowed loudly, pressing his lips together. Luke chuckled fondly as he lightly dug his finger into Ashton's side.

Ashton squealed loudly because he was ticklish there and by the sound of delight Luke made, he was clearly pleased to find out.

Before Ashton knew what was happening, Luke had flipped them over so he was straddling Ashton as his fingers dug into Ashton's side.

Ashton screamed, bursting into a fit of giggles because he was very ticklish there and Luke was relentless, mercilessly continuing to assault his sides.

"L-Luke, p-please!" Ashton begged, laughing so hard his eyes filled with tears that spilt over. He could feel his face flushed from laughter and he squirmed and wriggled beneath Luke because he was a little heavy and Ashton wasn't by any means strong.

"I-I'm go-nna pee m-myself! Lu-key, Lukey please!" Ashton cried out, his giggles bursting out due to Luke's attack. Luke chuckled above him fondly and eventually stopped when perhaps realising that Ashton would truly pee himself.

"You guys done having sex in there?" Ashton heard a voice say from the room next to them and Ashton's face flushed so red he was sure Luke would probably mistake him for a tomato. He brought his hands up to his face as though covering his face would stop him from feeling embarrassed.

Luke burst out laughing, the beautiful sound making Ashton's heart ache but he was still embarrassed so he kept his face covered as he listened to Luke's laugh, smiling at the sound.

Luke gently collapsed on Ashton once he finally stopped laughing and buried his face in the crook of Ashton's neck. Ashton giggled at the feeling but squirmed when he felt Luke place a soft kiss on his neck.

"Luke- Lukey stop," Ashton mumbled, even if it did feel nice.

"Why?" Luke mumbled, voice muffled by Ashton's neck. Ashton sighed not wanting to ruin the mood.

"We're not together, Luke," Ashton whispered, a part of him hoping Luke wouldn't hear but when Luke froze he knew he had.

"I thought you were starting to be okay with the idea of us maybe being together?" Luke's voice was so hopeful and Ashton hated himself more because he was always hurting Luke.

"I want to be with you, I really do... I just don't trust myself to be in a relationship yet," Ashton said, hoping Luke would understand. He'd give anything to tell Luke they could start dating if he wanted but he knew it wouldn't be right yet.

"Why not, Ash?" Ashton suppressed a smile at how childish Luke sounded.

"I don't trust people easily, Luke. If we were in a relationship, I'd be so insecure about it. It's not that I don't trust you but my insecurities outweigh the trust and it wouldn't be fair to you or myself," Ashton sighed because he wishes he wasn't such a screw up so that him and Luke could finally be together.

"Okay, I'm sorry baby. I just love being with you and it's easy to forget that we're just friends." Ashton nodded because he understood that. He just needs to feel better about himself before he can start a relationship, especially one with a soulmate that would most probably be for life. Luke and him will never fully be bonded which means they're relationship would already be lacking the solid foundation that every other soulmate relationship has.

Luke gave Ashton's side one lost poke for good measure and Ashton probably would've kicked Luke instinctively as he jumped and squealed if Luke wasn't completely clinging to him like a koala.

"Lukey, get off," Ashton giggled, trying to push Luke off but Luke acted like he didn't even notice.

"I like when you call me that," Luke said suddenly and Ashton felt him smiling into his neck. Ashton shivered as Luke's breath fanned across his neck and Luke grinned wider.

"What? Lukey?" Ashton asked, blushing a little because he doesn't know where the nickname came from. Luke nodded and Ashton giggled softly.

"I like when you call m-" Ashton stopped abruptly and flushed red because he couldn't believe he was actually going to say that. Luke laughed as he lifted himself up slightly and Ashton could feel Luke's breath against his face. He wanted to close his eyes but he knew Luke would just tell him to open them again so he squirmed and flushed because he could feel Luke's stare boring into him.

"You like when I call you baby, don't you?" Ashton pouted because he could hear the smirk in Luke's voice and he sounded so cocky that Ashton wanted to knee him in the balls but then flinched at the thought because that was really mean.

"No," Ashton grumbled because he didn't want to give Luke the satisfaction of knowing he had an effect on him even if it was probably too late for that.

"I'll just tickle you until you admit it, you know," Luke said smugly, his fingers ghosting over Ashton's side as he tried to wiggle away.

"Fine, I-I like it when you call me... that," Ashton blushed and closed his eyes in embarrassment because even if he couldn't see, he felt uncomfortable at the thought of Luke looking in his eyes.

"Call you what?" Luke whispered, voice closer than before. Ashton whined involuntarily and squirmed, squeezing his eyes closed tighter as he blushed even more. He muttered the answer but it was so soft and mumbled that Luke just tsked and poked Ashton's side. Ashton yelped and pouted because that's mean.

"B-baby, I like it when you call me baby," Ashton rushed out, flushed and embarrassed and he wanted to bury himself under a pile of dirt. "You're mean," Ashton mumbled, still unsuccessfully squirming beneath Luke.

"See, that wasn't so bad," Luke chuckled fondly and Ashton just huffed in annoyance.

"Open your eyes, baby," Luke whispered. Ashton sighed but reluctantly did so because Luke would just keep pestering him about it until he did.

When Luke's weight disappeared from above him, Ashton turned around and buried his head in the pillow. He didn't know why, considering he just woke up, but he felt as though he could sleep for another hour and quite frankly he fully intended on doing just that.

Ashton whined, however, when his head gave a painful throb. He thought his headache had finally succumbed but apparently not and he just wanted to sleep a little more but apparently that was too much to ask for.

He heard Luke rustling around the room and he wasn't sure what he was doing so he didn't want to interrupt. He wanted to ask if he had painkillers but he didn't want to annoy him because Luke always has to help him and he was sure it was probably getting frustrating.

The bed dipped again as Luke got back in to lay down and Ashton felt the fabric of a shirt Luke had put on as Luke pulled him closer. Ashton kept his eyes shut, hoping that if he fell asleep again that the pain in his head would go away, however, when it didn't he knew he'd just have to ask.

"Lukey?" Ashton asked and Luke hummed in response.

"Do-do you have painkillers?"

"Oh shit! I'm sorry baby. I had painkillers ready on the bedside to give to you this morning and I completely forgot." Luke shuffled beneath Ashton before gently grasping Ashton's hand, dropping two small pills onto his palm. Luke lifted his other hand only to place a cool glass in his grasp.

Ashton titled his head back and gulped the water down along with the pills. He sighed in relief because he didn't realise how dry his throat was so he gulped down some more before handing the glass back to Luke.

"Thanks," Ashton mumbled as he lay back down.

Ashton hummed in contentment as his headache slowly began to dim. He felt so comfortable with Luke, like he could lay here forever and never move and still be the happiest person alive.

"Lukey, can I ask you something?" Ashton whispered, not wanting to disturb the silence.

"What is it?" Luke replied in much the same tone. Ashton hesitated before asking, not knowing whether this was something weird to ask.

"You know you can ask me anything, Ash. Go on," Luke urged. Ashton swallowed before nodding his head slowly.

"Okay, um- what do you... look like?" Ashton asked. Ashton didn't know what he was expecting, but he certainly didn't expect sadness to seep through the soulmate bond. Did he upset Luke?

"I mean, I don't care what you look like, Lukey. I'm just curious but it doesn't matter to me anyways so you don't have to answer that," Ashton hurried afraid to have offended Luke by asking.

He probably thought Ashton wanted to know if he was good-looking but that wasn't the case because Luke would always be the most beautiful person in the world to Ashton even if he couldn't see him. Luke only seemed to grow sadder and Ashton hated feeling Luke so sad.

"I was just curious, Lukey. I'm sorry!" Ashton was starting to panic a little until Luke shushed him softly.

"I'm not offended, baby. I'm just- sad," Luke whispered. Ashton already knew he was sad but he needed to know why. He was about to ask until Luke answered anyways.

"I forgot that you can't see me. I forgot that you don't know what I look like and that you never will and it makes me sad because there's so many things I wish you could see.

I know that sounds so selfish of me because you're the one who has to live without your sight but I can't help but wish you could see me and everything else. I'm sorry, Ash," Luke said. His voice sounded pained but Ashton understood what Luke meant and he wasn't offended by it. He often felt sad himself and it was only natural that of course Luke would want him to see too.

"It's okay, Luke. I feel the same way too and it's okay for you to feel that. I just don't want you to resent me for it."

"I would never resent you for that, Ashton. I promise." Luke placed a feather light kiss on Ashton's forehead making Ashton smile.

"You want to know what I look like?" Luke confirmed and Ashton nodded eagerly because he really did. Luke cleared his throat dramatically making Ashton giggle before he began.

"Uh, well I have blue eyes and blonde hair. Oh, and I have a lip ring but I think you remember that."

Ashton frowned at Luke's vague description and almost snorted because that was the worst description he'd ever heard in his life.

"Why are you frowning?" Luke asked, sounding like a pouting child and Ashton giggled.

"That wasn't a very good description, Lukey," Ashton said fondly because even though he now knew Luke had blonde hair and blue eyes, so did a lot of other people and he just wanted a little more detail

Ashton wanted to ask Luke something else but now he was sure Luke would find this weird and he fidgeted a little because it was an odd thing to ask and he felt embarrassed just thinking about it.

"Uh, Lukey?" Ashton began a little nervously.

"Oh God, you think I'm ugly now don't you?" Luke said, seeming distressed and it made Ashton giggle because he would never find Luke ugly but also because his description was hardly much to go on.

"No, I wanted- can I... feel your face?" Ashton buried his face in Luke's chest because it came out sounding so odd and his face felt hot with embarrassment.

"What?" Luke laughed.

"I just wanted to get an idea of what you look like," Ashton mumbled into Luke's shirt.

"Sure, baby," Luke said softly, grin evident in his voice.

Ashton nodded softly before finally lifting his head so that his chin was propped on Luke's chest. He lifted his hands hesitantly and felt up Luke's chest until he reached his face.

He had stubble along his jaw but otherwise soft skin. Luke was smiling and Ashton felt he had dimples and it made him smile because he could imagine it. Ashton ran his fingertips along Luke's lips that were soft and plump with the metallic touch of a lip ring.

His nose was only slightly pointy, almost petite. His eyes were small and his eyelashes fluttered beneath his fingertips at the gentle touch. Ashton felt the gentle curve of his eyebrows and the soft expanse of his forehead.

His hair was soft and fell over his forehead and felt as though it were probably mess from sleeping but he could imagine how beautiful he must look.

His face felt just shy of oval as he ran his hands memorising Luke's face, he loved that he could almost imagine him.

"What shade of blonde is your hair?" Ashton asked. Luke cleared his throat before answering.

"When I was younger it was more light blonde but now it's a dark blonde, I guess." Ashton nodded in response, adding it to the mental picture he had developed.

"Skin tone?"

"I suppose I'm pretty pale," Luke chuckled, a hint of nervousness as though he thought there was a chance that Ashton may not find him attractive.

"What shade of blue are your eyes?"

"Uh, light blue." Ashton felt Luke shrug and smiled because Luke was so beautiful. Even though it would never matter to Ashton what Luke looked like physically because he'd never be able to see him and all that mattered was that he was beautiful in every other way, he still felt his heart flutter because Luke was clearly physically gorgeous as well.

"You're beautiful," Ashton whispered in awe and he felt the skin of Luke's cheeks beneath his fingertips heat up and he knew he was blushing. Ashton giggled and Luke huffed out in mock annoyance.

Ashton removed his hands from Luke's face and snuggled back into his chest, sighing in contentment.

"How do Michael and Calum look?" Ashton asked, even though Luke clearly wasn't a very descriptive person, Ashton loved listening to Luke talk even just for a little bit.

"Well, Cal's tan. He has really dark hair that has these stupid blonde highlights in the front. I keep telling him to take them out but Michael loves them and apparently that's the only opinion that matters.

He has really chubby cheeks and when we were younger I always used to squish them. Oh and his eyes are brown," Luke said and Ashton smiled because he was honestly trying harder to help Ashton visualise and he appreciated that.

"You used to be friends with Mikey, didn't you?" Luke asked, clearly confused as to why Ashton needed a description.

"Yeah, but I only know what ten-year-old Michael looks like. I just want an idea of what he looks like now," Ashton said. Usually he wouldn't ask people to waste their time describing things to him other than his mom because she never seemed to mind but apparently neither did Luke. It was clear he didn't want to talk about himself at first but when the topic changed to Calum and Michael he clearly didn't mind and Ashton was glad.

"Michael has really bright red hair, brighter than a coke can-"

"What?" Ashton gasped. He always assumed Michael was still blonde but clearly not and Luke chuckled at Ashton's reaction.

"Yeah, he dyes his hair all the time and Cal and I always joke that it's all going to fall off one day but he just ignores us. This is the longest he's gone with the same colour but I think it's because this is Cal's favourite colour on him, other than his original hair colour of course.

So yeah, he has green eyes. He's more pale than me which people wouldn't think possible but it is because Michael hates the sun more than anyone I know. He also has an eyebrow piercing," Luke finished and Ashton, though not surprised that Michael was pale because he never wanted to play outside as a kid anyways, was surprised by how different he seemed otherwise. He didn't mind of course; he was just surprised.

Ashton and Luke spent the day lying in bed and Luke talked about movies and TV shows that he liked because Ashton doesn't want to just listen to them and be confused so he doesn't watch them.

He described all the things Ashton wanted to know and Luke would make comparisons and spend almost half an hour describing one thing just so Ashton would have no doubt about what it looked like.

Ashton spent his time talking about all the books he loves and although there're a lot, Luke insisted he continued and honestly didn't seem bored of the conversation despite him not being one to read.

He didn't think the day could get any more perfect. Ashton didn't think about how different he is to everyone else and for a moment even forgot that he's blind because when he's with Luke he isn't blind, he's Ashton. Just Ashton. Because that's all that mattered to Luke and maybe one day that's all that would matter to Ashton too.

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