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“Coz you are a piece of me

 

 

I wish I didn’t need,

 

 

Chasing relentlessly

 

 

Still fight but I don’t know why.

 

 

If our love is tragedy why are you my remedy?

 

 

If our love’s insanity why are you my clarity?”

Trapping me inside a realm of just plain music-a world far more satisfactory than our planet itself-I have come to the conclusion that earplugs and iPods are by far the best things our kind has ever crafted.

 

 

All hail Apple Stores!

 

 

This song, Clarity by Zedd ft. Foxes, along with the other 20,000 songs in my playlist are my temporary getaway from all the stress life continues to punch me with.

 

 

ADMIT IT!

 

 

MUSIC IS THE ULTMATE ESCAPE FROM THE BULLSHIT OF LIFE.

 

 

Do y’all agree?

 

 

I’ll take your scrolling as a yes.

 

 

Still ensnared by the powerful addicting sound of the tune, my head slightly moved with the beat and my lips couldn’t help but hum or sing along with the captivating lyrics.

 

 

And I couldn’t help but relate to what the song’s message was.

 

 

A love struggling to be freed from the entangling vines of negativity and opposition.

 

 

A lover who denies and a lover who still tries.

 

 

A complicated affection, I presume.

 

 

And there was only one person I could think of who might be sharing the same emotion as the singer of the song had.

 

 

Me.

 

 

And the person the song is dedicated to?

 

 

I think you have a pretty good guess on who that might be already.

 

 

But the sudden grasping of a hand on my shoulder shook me out of the trance the song had lulled me in.

 

 

I almost had a heart attack when that same person suddenlytook one of my earplugs out of my ear.

 

 

I jerked around in my seat,shocked as my solitude inside the music world has been disturbed.

 

 

I cursed out loud still confused and infuriated by the sudden distraction.

 

 

I hate it when people mess with me when I’m in the mood for music.

 

 

Alli, Kat and Greg knew that.

 

 

And speaking of whom, the scent of the person behind the rude act smelled that of my brother’s cologne.

 

 

‘Damn, I missed your voice.’

 

 

The person spoke.

 

 

And just like that, just by that voice, my heart melted hopelessly, my throat felt so tight and my eyes lost its control and gave way for the tears to freely flow.

 

 

It felt like everything has stopped.

 

 

It felt like everything just froze as that voice-that same voice I’ve been dying to hear-spoke.

 

 

It didn’t take long before hands took me in an embrace I’ve been dreading to have for a month now, a very new but a familiar feeling.

 

 

It felt like ages since the last time a hug like this was given to me.

 

 

So tight yet so gentle.

 

 

So secured and so safe.

 

 

‘Oh, Niall.’

 

 

I can hear the grief in that person’s voice.

 

 

And I couldn’t think of anything but to just hold him tighter in response.

 

 

As if there will be no more opportunity available for this to happen.

 

 

And that thought scared the hell out of me that it basically drove me to sob.

 

 

And I didn’t care.

 

 

‘Shhhhh…’

 

 

He shushed me calmingly.

 

 

And Lord knows I could almost feel like my five year-old self again when we were in this same position after we found out that there will be no father or a mom that would pick us up from school, take us to carnivals…and love us.

 

 

I feel exactly like that right now.

 

 

A child clinging to his only family left.

 

 

‘You know I hate it when you cry.’

 

 

He whispered against my locks.

 

 

‘You know I hate it when you mess with my music trips.’

 

 

I whispered back against his shirt.

 

 

I heard his chuckle echoing around the room and it was a joy to hear it after so many days of not hearing anything from him.

 

 

‘I missed you, Greg. You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.’

 

 

I said as I tried recovering from the tears and emotions.

 

 

‘Oh, I missed you more than you could possibly imagine. Niall, have you any idea how much my one and only brother mean to me? It scared me to death when I got the call. And it pissed me the hell off when my senior never allowed me to come visit you. He’s a jerk. I punched him square in the face as I was so mad about his bullshits but unfortunately, that took me a goddamn two week suspension. I wasn’t allowed to fly plus my paycheck had to be cut in half during my absence. But you know what the worst part was? We were in Thailand! I was stranded in Thailand for two weeks because of that fucking fucktard!’

 

 

Although I’ve been wanting to hear his explanation for so long, although I’ve been dreading to know the reason behind his absence, I already forgave him.

 

 

 As soon as I heard his voice, every hatred and loathing I had planted towards him had been washed out of my senses.

 

 

 His presence here with me now means more to me than his absence.

 

 

‘…and after my suspension ended, I got my schedule back on track but then this typhoon came on the way and we were stranded in the Philippines for nearly ten days. When everything seemed okay to resume the postponed flights, these fucking mixed-up connecting flights made my two-day travel almost six days so over all, it took me over a month to just come see you.’

 

 

‘But you’re here now. And I think that counts most.’

 

 

‘Yeah. But still…I’m really sorry if I hadn’t been there for you. I should’ve just taken another job. This flight attendant shit just takes me away from you. I can’t take care of you with all the drama and fucking asshole co-workers! If I just hadn’t lost control…if I just calmed myself down a bit, maybe I could’ve been there…helping my little brother out. I’m so sorry I hadn’t been a good brother to you, Niall.’

 

 

‘Shush…please stop talking like that, Greg. You are doing everything you can for us to make it and I feel so blessed having a guy like you in my life. Please don’t blame yourself for what happened. Please. I don’t want you to feel that way. It would kill me if you do.’

 

 

I hugged him tighter as I heard his voice choked with emotion.

 

 

‘I’m just so glad you’re here. It really made me happy.’

 

 

‘Anything for you, Niall.Anything for my little brother.’

 

 

He let our clinging arms and connected bodies apart as I felt him looking at me in inspection.

 

 

‘I really wish I could see your blue eyes again. I really miss them.’

 

 

I looked down as another wave of unknown emotions flooded my senses.

 

 

The prospect of never seeing him, his soulful eyes, short jet black hair, annoyingly-fast-growing beard and all other feature of him drove me further to hopelessness and letting the tears flood my face seemed to be the only thing I’m able to do at that instant.

 

 

‘Hey, hey…’

 

 

He held my hand but my tears seemed to overpower his comforting efforts.

 

 

‘Don’t feel like that, Niall…don’t you even dare, for a second, feel like there is no hope for you to recover from all of this shit. Because even if it costs my life, I’ll do anything to find a way to help you get your eyesight back. I promise.’

 

 

‘But it would be such a hassle, especially for you. I mean, you already have the debt collection agency on your back. I don’t want you to suffer that much, Greg. I don’t want that!’

 

 

‘Fuck that! Fuck bills! Fuck debts! All that matters is for my little brother to be okay. And I’d do everything for that to happen. I promise you.’

 

 

As much as I agree with his assuring words, I couldn’t feel more sorry for myself.

 

 

I don’t want to cause any more trouble to anyone.

 

 

Especially to Greg.

 

 

But all these worries failed to linger as the remaining earplug which was still on my other ear produced another song, a song I have adored greatly, a song so powerful and so moving, a song which reminded me a lot of Greg.

 

 

And its occurrence could not be more opportune for everything it conveyed just conquered all my discomforts and concerns.

 

 

As it played, I just stayed silent while the lyrics sank in.

 

 

As it played, I just stayed seated pulling my brother into an embrace, holding on to him as I pictured him mouthing the words of the song, as if he’s the one singing it to me:

 

 

“Don’t you worry, don’t you worry child,

 

 

See, heaven’s got a plan for you.

 

 

Don’t you worry, don’t you worry now…”

++++

AWWWWWW Greeeeeg!!! *sobs*

As you know i couldn't upload 2 video links in here so i just searched the internet and found this cool mashup on Youtube on Clarity and Don't You Worry Child which are included in this chappie..

so enjoy an eargasm guys!

But anyways comment, vote and follow me!!!

~_~

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