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Vic

I'm sitting at the dining table planning out our daily activities to match our original ones in Paris when my husband stirs awake.

He had looked so comfortable, so peaceful sleeping only a minute ago but as he blinks his eyes open a grimace covers his face.

"Morning, Darling." I chirp, but he glares at me.

"Why did you let me sleep in this suit?" he grumbles, rolling out of bed.

He begins aggressively tearing each layer of his clothing off until he's left in nothing but his boxers.

"So I could see you strip." I joke.

That earns his first smile of the day.

"Loser." he mumbles as he falls back down on the bed.

He rests on his stomach, propping himself up with his elbows. I can feel him watching me as I look down at my phone, trying to find a phone number for the French restaurant downtown.

"Sorry about last night. I didn't mean to fall asleep." Kellin apologises.

I look back at him confused.

"Love, you were tired. It's okay." I assure him.

He smiles as he rolls onto his back. I can't help but to blush at the reveal of his bare chest. My eyes travel down to his thighs where his boxer shorts have hitched up.

"What are you doing?" he mumbles, eyeing me.

"Planning out our day." I chirp, turning back to my phone.

"Why don't you come back to bed?" he suggests.

I can hear the flirtatiousness in his tone which immediately has me sold on his request.

I leave my phone on the table and go crawl back into bed next to Kellin. He's quick to take my face and kiss me passionately. I place my hand on his waist, pulling his body closer to mine, matching his eagerness. He hooks his leg around mine, causing him to press himself against me even more. At this point, I don't think it's physically possible for us to get closer.

As the kiss goes on, his tongue works it's way into my mouth. I can feel him getting turned on against me and the thought of that alone turns me on.

I'm not as nervous right now as I was last night. Now that this is not so formal and it's more spontaneous, I feel more comfortable. It's as if there's fewer expectations.

Kellin pulls from the kiss, breathing heavily as he pushes me down on the bed. He then climbs on top of me, giving me the opportunity to admire him and how beautiful he looks in the morning.

He leans down and kisses me again, rolling his hips into me as he does so.

I lose myself completely in him as his lips devour mine and his fingertips nuzzle my chest.

I'm so entranced by him that I almost don't hear the knock on the door. But the immediate anxiety that's evident in Kellin's panicked eyes and his now-rigid body is enough to pull me back into the real world.

"Oh baby, I ordered breakfast, I'm sorry." I apologise quickly.

He sighs and melts on top of me as relief replaces his unease.

"Oh, okay." he murmurs.

I kiss his head and gently move him off of me as I get up. I pull the duvet over Kellin to protect his modesty then I go into the bathroom, finding a robe.

I cover myself then finally answer the door. A man wheeling a cart of food greets me and comes into the room.

"On the table should be fine," I direct him.

He begins setting out our food and I go back over to my husband, sitting down next to him on the bed. Kellin rests his head on my shoulder seeming saddened. I run my fingers along his spine in hopes to relieve him of his melancholy.

"You also wanted the minibar emptied?" the server asks.

"Yes please." I confirm.

He starts loading the small bottles of alcohol from the fridge onto the cart.

Kellin sighs softly, seeming more disheartened and I worry that the sight of alcohol has triggered him. He takes his head from my shoulder and falls back down on the bed.  He turns away from me and pulls the duvet up to his neck.

My heart aches. I don't like seeing him so down.

Soon enough, the server leaves the room so I go over to our food.

"Come have some breakfast, Darling." I suggest.

"I'm not hungry." he mumbles, still not looking at me.

I persist despite his rejection.

"I ordered you this really nice French coffee that you'd like. It was made specifically for you." I sing.

Kellin frowns as he turns back towards me.

"I don't like coffee." he grumbles, but he looks curious.

"You'll like this one, trust me." I smirk.

"What is it?" he asks skeptically.

"A depresso expresso." I grin, jokingly.

He rolls his eyes but a beautiful smile breaks out onto his face.

"Why?" he whines, throwing the duvet off of himself. "Why did I marry you?"

"Because you love me." I chirp as he bounces over to me.

"That I do." he beams, pecking my lips.

"I'm only joking bub, I got you a hot chocolate. Drink up, it'll make you feel better." I assure him, handing him the steaming mug.

He sits down and blows away the steam before sipping his coffee-less drink.

"What did you order?" he asks eagerly, definitely seeming hungry now.

I remove the silver cloche from the first dish.

"Here we have a baguette with jam and butter." I reveal and Kellin responds with a simple "ooh".

I take the cloche off the second dish. 

"And here we have some croissants," I say in my best, yet terrible, French accent. "And some breakfast cookies because the French are awesome."

Kellin giggles, seeming to enjoy my commentary.

"And lastly," I chirp lifting the final cloche. "Some French toast!"

Kellin chuckles and gives me a confused look.

"I don't think French toast is actually from France, babe." he smirks.

"I know," I admit. "But turns out the French actually aren't really big on breakfast so I was running out of options."

"Well cultural inaccuracies aside, this is really nice. Thank you." he smiles sweetly.

I kiss his temple and say "you're welcome" before I sit down next to him.

We both begin eating and Kellin seems more at ease now but I definitely want to know what was bothering him.

"Is the hot chocolate good?" I ask him.

"So good." he nods. "You want some?"

I shake my head, gesturing to my own mug. "I'm happy with my coffee."

I pick it up and take a sip. I'm pleased. Coffee can be hit or miss depending where you get it, and the coffee here is pretty damn good.

"I don't get why you don't like coffee." I pout. "I married a man that doesn't like coffee."

"Well I like you. And I think that is enough." Kellin giggles.

I smile fondly at him as he nuzzles his chin into my shoulder.

"It's more than enough." I sigh dreamily.

I wrap and arm around him and kiss his forehead.

"I would appreciate it if you were to tell me why you were so upset before." I say gently.

Kellin sighs and frowns.

"It doesn't matter. This is our honeymoon. We don't need to go into it." Kellin mumbles trying to brush me off.

I frown and shake my head.

"It matters to me. And it clearly mattered to you. Come on, Husband, I would like to listen. I want you to feel better so we can enjoy our honeymoon." I urge.

He smiles a little at 'husband' but his small smile is short-lived.

He lets out a drawn out sigh as he leans into me.

"I'm terrified of the fucking door." he huffs.

"No you're not. Don't devalue your feelings, Kell. You're afraid of what used to come through the door, which is completely understandable." I explain.

He huffs again.  

"I just wish I was stronger." he sighs. "And I'm so fucking sick of him still affecting me. I don't want to be making out with my husband and suddenly I'm thinking about him, you know? And then one glance at alcohol and I'm like "I need a drink". Still! I've been sober for a year and I still just want to drink my feelings away. This just fucking sucks. I just want things to be how they're supposed to be." he exclaims.

My heart hurts because I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to help him. I just want him to feel better.

His eyes hold genuine sadness and frustration which just adds to mine.

"I know it sucks, Baby. And I wish there was something I could do to make it all better. But I think the only thing that is going to make this better is time," I murmur before kissing his head. "And I know you don't want to hear it, but maybe a professional's guidance might help too."

Kellin sighs and shakes his head.

"Vic, babe, I don't need a professional." he sighs.

"If you say so. You know yourself better than I do." I nod. "But I know there's a lot you're holding in. It would really make me feel a lot better if you would just talk to someone. Even if it's just Jenna, or perhaps even me if you'd be comfortable with that. You should know better than anyone, Kells, that keeping things to yourself is never the solution."

He glances at me, tears glittering in his eyes.

"I know." he simply whispers.

Then he intakes a deep breath and blinks away his tears.

"So what did you plan for today?" he asks changing the subject and clearing his throat.

"Okay, so," I begin, taking a moment to collect my scattered thoughts. "We are going to go visit a farmer's market, then I booked us a French cooking class, then I thought we could go recreate the Love Lock bridge at a random bridge somewhere, then I was going to book us a little row boat so we could watch the sunset from the water and afterwards we would have dinner at that French restaurant downtown. Oh and I wanted to have a picnic for lunch."

I'm out of breath by the time I'm finished and Kellin is looking at me like I'm insane.

"Babe, while I love that you're eager and thoughtful, you are way too ambitious." he chuckles. "That's a lot for one day. Why don't we break it up for the rest of the week?"

"Okay." I blush feeling a little embarrassed.

"I haven't started the day off the best so maybe we should go a little simple today." he suggests.

I nod in agreement. I didn't get much sleep last night and I'm still feeling a little warn down from the wedding, so a simple day sounds perfect.

"Well since you already booked the cooking class, let's do that. It sounds like fun and we'll probably get lunch out of it. And then why don't we relax for the rest of the day and go get dinner at the French restaurant tonight?" he suggests.

"That sounds great." I grin.

"Oh and tomorrow we'll do something super romantic. Like let's do the Love Lock bridge, great idea by the way, and book the rowboat for sunset. And if you want, we could have a picnic dinner on the boat."

The excitement in his eyes makes me smile.

"Fuck I love you." I whisper.

He leans forward and kisses me.

"I love you too. I am so ready to have the best honeymoon ever." he grins, wrapping his arms around my neck.

With his beautiful smile back on his face and the happiness returned to his eyes, I have no doubt this honeymoon is going to be perfect.

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