Chapter 9: 8 - We're Hiding Out in A Dream

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This chapter is dedicated to wickedeternity because she always motivates me to write! She gives me feedback and encourages me so thanks a ton! :)

Sorry for the delay in this chapter I honestly have no excuse other than being lazy af.

Ashton gif is his outfit in this chapter. He looks so damn good looking it's actually painful.

Please let me know if you notice any spelling or grammatical errors so that I can fix them!

Don't forget to comment and/or vote if you enjoyed the chapter. - Vanessa

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Ashton was back in his dorm after purchasing his glasses and saying goodbye to Harry. Luke had to take Aleisha back as he was her lift and it gave Ashton an uncomfortable feeling because they used to date and he wouldn't blame Luke for wanting to be with her even if they'd just gotten together themselves.

He was lying in bed on his laptop deciding on new books to order. He didn't have a lot of extra money to spend and braille books were expensive so he knew he could only buy one or two and it'd just have to do.

Ashton got frustrated, however, when he couldn't find what he wanted in braille. He was tried of hearing the guys going on about Game of Thrones when he couldn't watch the show and now apparently he couldn't find the books. He didn't like audio books because he preferred to read but he wasn't seeing another choice.

He knew there was an app for it on his phone but he hardly used his phone except for texting occasionally, calling and recording for his lectures. He didn't know how to get apps and he was pretty sure his phone didn't have any. He never really had a use for his phone as he didn't have many friends to contact so he never went on it.

Just as he picked up the device to try and figure out how to get it, there was a knock on the door. He hoped it wasn't Brad who had now developed a habit of losing the keys so he sighed and went to answer the door.

"Hey, Ash." Ashton's eyes widened when he heard Luke's voice.

"Luke? What are you doing here?" Ashton asked a little confused because he had seen him not too long ago and he was surprised he was here.

"So, Mikey and Calum went to this pizza place or whatever and I was wondering if you wanted our first date to be like a double date with the guys so that you'd feel more comfortable?" Luke hurried, sounding a little uncertain and maybe even nervous.

"Wh- now?" Ashton asked, panicking a little because he didn't know if he was ready to have his first date now.

"Only if you want. We don't have to," Luke assured him, sounding a little let down and it made Ashton frown.

"We can go, Lukey," Ashton said nervously because he wanted to make Luke happy and at least the guys would be there so he wouldn't be too nervous about it.

"Are you sure?" Luke asked and Ashton nodded.

"I need to get ready," he mumbled, leaving the door open as he went to his cupboard. He felt around but he wasn't sure what to wear and it was making him more nervous. He opted for a short sleeve shirt that he wasn't sure what the design was but hoped it was okay.

"Lukey, what colour is this shirt?" Ashton asked, holding it up.

"It's black," he said, voice coming from the direction of the desk and Ashton assumed he was siting there.

"And these jeans?" He asked, holding up a pair. He was pretty sure judging by the rips in them that they were black because he didn't think he had a pair of blue ripped jeans but he couldn't remember.

"They're also black," Luke said patiently and Ashton was relieved he didn't seem annoyed in the slightest. Ashton nodded tentatively and just elected for this outfit because he didn't have time to be too picky and they were just going for pizza.

"Lukey, can- can you not look please?" He asked nervously.

"Of course, baby," Luke said but Ashton still froze for a bit because he didn't know if Luke had really looked away. It seemed silly but he had always been insecure and not being able to see what he looked like enhanced that insecurity.

"Y-you promise you're not looking?" Ashton whispered, hoping Luke wasn't lying.

"I'd never use you being blind against you, Ash. You're not comfortable with me looking and I wouldn't do that to you. You can trust me, I promise," Luke said gently and Ashton sighed but nodded.

"I'm not looking, you can change," Luke assured and Ashton tried to hide a little behind the cupboard door that was still open and turned his back to face Luke because even if he promised not to look it still felt weird changing knowing Luke was sitting right there. He felt exposed but Luke promised not to look and he needed to trust him if this relationship was going to work.

"You done yet?" Luke asked just as Ashton was done slipping on his shirt.

"Yeah, I'm done," Ashton said, picking up his clothes that he'd dropped on the floor and throwing them into the cupboard because he was too lazy to do anything about them now.

"You look beautiful," Luke said sincerely and Ashton blushed and lowered his head in an attempt to hide it.

"It's no different to what I usually wear," he pointed out but Luke just chuckled fondly.

"Exactly. You always look beautiful," Luke said.

"Thank you, I'm sure you look beautiful too," he murmured shyly.

"Thanks, baby," Luke said a little sadly and Ashton knew it was because he wished Ashton could see.

Ashton sat on the edge of his bed and tied on his shoes after feeling for the converse label on the side and confirming they were his favourite pair. When he was done he sat up and felt for his glasses on the headboard, sliding them on. He ran his hand through his hair, moving his curly fringe a little to the side and hoped it didn't look too messy.

After making sure he had his phone and wallet in his back pocket, he slipped the cane around his wrist and wiped his sweaty palms a little on his jeans because he was still nervous. He was glad this was a casual date because the thought of a fancy dinner alone with Luke made his stomach clench with nerves because he was so awkward he was sure he'd have ruined everything.

He felt Luke's arm link with his and jumped a little because the sleeve of his jacket was cold. Ashton brought his hand to feel the fabric a little forgetting for a moment that that was probably something weird to do.

"Is that leather?" Ashton asked.

"Yeah," Luke chuckled and Ashton nodded.

"I like leather jackets," he stated as he closed the door behind them.

"It'd look good on you," Luke said and Ashton blushed a little.

"Are we walking?" He asked because it felt nice out, not too chilly.

"Yeah. You don't mind do you?" Ashton shook his head, assuming Luke was looking at him and could see.

"Lukey, can- can we hold hands?" Ashton asked.

"Of course, baby. Isn't it easier if our arms are linked though for me to help you?"

"It is but I just wanted us to do what other couples do, you know? I can use my cane as we hold hands?" Ashton questioned, nervous that Luke was looking for a reason not to hold his hand or something.

Even though his hands were a little sweaty from nerves he still wanted this because he'd always envisioned scenarios with his soulmate before they met and this was something he'd always wanted. It may seem a little silly to others to want something so small but to Ashton it meant a lot.

Ashton's heart fluttered when Luke removed his arm from where it was linked with Ashton's to intertwine their fingers. He was a little surprised and maybe even embarrassed that his fingers were longer than Luke's. He assumed because Luke was taller he'd have bigger hands but clearly not. He was glad he didn't seem to mind his sweaty palms and abnormally long fingers, however, because it felt nice to have the comfort of Luke's touch.

The warmth of his hand seemed to radiate through Ashton and he was glad that he'd decided to give their relationship a try. He just prayed it would work out because he didn't know what would happen if it didn't.

Ashton forgot all about his nerves for a moment as he listened to Luke's soothing and soft voice as he discussed his degree. He was studying Music and Ashton couldn't imagine a better course suited for him.

As Luke talked, however, Ashton couldn't help but wonder what little tells made Luke. He wanted to know what he looked like when he was deep in thought. He wanted to know how his eyebrows furrowed and how he looked when he smiled. He wanted to see the different shades of his eyes and the way he'd maybe gesticulate as he spoke. There were so many small things that made Luke who he was and those were simple things that he would never know and he wished more than anything he could.

"What's wrong?" Luke asked concerned, stopping mid-sentence and making Ashton feel bad for indirectly interrupting him.

"Nothing," Ashton said as convincing as he could. Ashton could sense Luke was about to argue but Luke's phone went off before he could say anything. Ashton recognised the ringtone as I Miss You by Blink 182.

"Hello? Oh hey, Mikey." Luke answered. "Yeah we're on our way now. No- well I guess we could. Is everything alright?" He sounded confused but it was difficult for Ashton to decipher the conversation from only one end. "Yeah yeah, okay. I'll let you know when we're done I guess. Okay, see you a bit later then. Bye," Luke said, ending the call.

"What is it?" Ashton asked as he heard Luke sigh beside him.

"Something came up so Michael and Calum wont be there for the first part of the date. They said they could still meet up with us for ice-cream later after the pizza," Luke said but he sounded unsure and even a little nervous and Ashton wasn't sure why so he asked.

"Well, I mean if you want to cancel the date I'd understand," Luke whispered softly and Ashton felt his heart ache a little at Luke's uncertainty which was so unlike his confident demeanour.

"Of course I don't want to cancel the date, Lukey," Ashton replied confidently. He was nervous to go on the date alone with Luke but there was no way he'd cancel on him.

"Are you sure? We can always go another time when the guys can come with us," Luke assured but he sounded so hopeful that Ashton actually didn't mind going. He hoped he wouldn't mess it up, however, because he always messes things up.

"I'm sure," Ashton affirmed, nodding in the hopes of sounding more confident. Ashton couldn't see Luke but he assumed he would probably be smiling as he intertwined their fingers together and continued to walk.

"Since you're studying music, do you play any instruments?" Ashton asked softly.

"Oh yeah. I can play the guitar, Calum taught me how to play the bass when we were younger and I can also play the drums," Luke replied and Ashton's interest perked up.

"The drums?" He asked.

"Yeah, do you play?" Luke asked but Ashton quickly shook his head.

"No. I always wanted to play the drums when I was younger but after the accident it was so difficult to do simple everyday things that learning to play just seemed like so much effort when I was already struggling. My parents also spent so much money on me that I didn't want to add any unnecessary costs," Ashton said sadly.

"Well, I could show you how to play sometime if you want?" Luke offered and Ashton immediately turned to face Luke.

"Really?" He breathed, voice almost lost in the slight breeze. He didn't want to get his hopes up too high in case Luke just offered out of obligation.

"Yeah, would you like that?" Ashton could hear the smile in Luke's voice as the shorter of the two nodded eagerly before Luke could even finish the sentence.

"We could go after having pizza? The music room will be empty by the time and that's the only place I know that has a drum kit."

"Yeah, okay. Thank you, Lukey," Ashton said softly, so incredibly excited.

Soon enough they arrived at the pizza place and Ashton blushed when his stomach grumbled a little loudly but Luke just chuckled and led him to their table.

Ashton could hear the waiter placing the menu in front of him but made no move to open it.

"Hello, my name is Liam and I'll be your waiter. Can I get you two something to drink?" The waiter asked. His voice sounded warm and inviting with an English accent.

"I'll have a coke," Luke said and Ashton quickly racked his brain for what he wanted to drink.

"Um, I'll have- I'll have an iced tea," he said, blushing a little as he turned his head to face the table.

"It'll be right up," he replied before leaving and suddenly Ashton felt incredibly nervous as he fiddled with the end of the menu. He didn't know what to talk about and suddenly being in a date setting made the pressure for conversation even more prominent.

"Hey," Luke said gently as his hand came to rest on top of Ashton's. "You okay?" He asked. Ashton nodded nervously.

"What pizzas are there here?" Ashton asked timidly.

"Ah fuck, I always forget! Sorry baby." Ashton couldn't help but chuckle a little as Luke's hand left his and he heard the shuffling of the menu.

After reading the menu in detail and making jokes and telling their waiter that they weren't ready to order yet, Luke finally placed the menu down.

"Okay, do you know what you want?" He asked happily.

"Hm, I don't know. You might have to read it again," Ashton joked making Luke chuckle.

"Are you two ready to order now?" Their waiter asked. Luke happily ordered his sweet chilli chicken pizza and Ashton giggled softly at his excitement for pizza even though he was equally as excited.

"I'll have the caramelised onion pizza with extra cheese," Ashton said when the waiter had asked him.

"Ew, that doesn't sound very nice," Luke said once the waiter had left.

"What?" He asked in confusion, brows furrowed.

"Onions on pizza. Gross," Luke said playfully.

"Hey," Ashton said, feigning hurt and pouting his bottom lip. Luke laughed loudly and Ashton couldn't hold back the giggles that escaped.

So far dinner had gone better than Ashton could've imagined. He learned that Luke had two brothers; Jack and Ben who he loved completely. He told him funny stories from when he was younger that had Ashton in hysterics. He learned that because his mom is a maths teacher she used to make him do maths all the time and he loved hearing Luke talk about his family. He sounded so completely happy that it made Ashton feel warm and content.

"What about you?" Luke asked, probably noticing that Ashton hadn't said much. Ashton hated talking about himself but knew it was unfair to not offer anything in return.

"Well, as you know after meeting my family I have two younger siblings; Lauren and Harry. We get on really well even though I could never play football with Harry in the backyard or help Lauren practice her reading they never seem to mind and we're really close. My dad owns a company so he's really busy a lot but we're still close and we would hang out all the time having 'father-son days' just for the two of us which I love. I'm closest with my mom though. She just seems to understand me completely without even trying. She's the most patient and kind woman ever and I'm really lucky to have her as a mom."

Ashton went on to tell Luke stories that involved Michael when they were little because those were the funniest. He avoided talking about after the age of 10 because there was nothing very fun or exciting after that age. Luke laughed and joked with Ashton, asking for details on specific stories and Ashton loved how easy it was to talk with him.

Ashton was starting his last pizza slice after finishing his story on the time at Michael's house when he was playing guitar hero so violently at home he somehow ended up slapping his mom on the face with the guitar. Neither boy knew how it had happened and it still made Ashton hysterical to this day because even though he'd felt bad at the time and Michael had cried out of guilt, it was still the funniest thing that had ever happened.

"Hey Ash?" Luke asked suddenly, his voice a little quiet. Ashton hummed in response as he chewed on his slice, savouring the goodness.

"What- what happened?"

"What do you mean?" Ashton asked once he'd swallowed. Luke sighed a little and Ashton frowned in confusion.

"I mean, how did you- what happened- how did you end up blind?" Luke asked nervously and Ashton froze, his grip on the pizza slice tightened.

"Luke-"

"It's just, you never talk about it or anytime after that and I just- I'm your soulmate. I should know this, right?"

"Please," Ashton whispered softly.

"What?"

"Please don't ask me, Lukey. If you ask I'll have to tell you and I can't. Not yet. Please, Lukey. Please please please don't ask me," Ashton begged, his voice cracking and his eyes welling up with tears that threatened to spill over.

"Fuck, I'm sorry baby! Don't cry I promise I wont ask again. You don't have to tell me until you're ready I promise I wont ask again," Luke hurried out in panic and Ashton just nodded before placing his pizza slice down, not having much of an appetite anymore.

The rest of dinner was quiet. Ashton didn't find it awkward, however, he was just lost in thought and perhaps he should've noticed how nervous Luke was becoming through the bond but he was just thinking so deeply he didn't notice anything else.

"Do you hate me now?" Luke whispered once their hands were intertwined and they were on their way to the music room before meeting Michael and Calum for ice-cream.

"Huh?" Ashton asked, shaking away his thoughts and trying to focus on what Luke was saying.

"I asked if you hate me," Luke said dejectedly and Ashton finally noticed how nervous and upset Luke was through the bond.

"What? Of course not. Why would you think that?" Ashton asked, honestly confused.

"You haven't said a word after I asked..."

Ashton sighed. "I'm sorry, Lukey. I was just thinking I didn't mean to make you think that I was angry," Ashton said honestly.

"Are you sure?" Luke asked, still sounding unsure. Ashton nodded firmly and gripped Luke's hand tighter in his own because he doesn't blame Luke for asking, he just doesn't want to talk about it yet. Ashton could feel Luke's relief and he smiled softly in return.

Soon enough they arrived in the music room and it was so incredibly quiet after the insistent buzz of people from outside that it was relieving. Ashton listened to the quiet sound of Luke's breathing as he led him deeper into the music room.

"Okay, sit down here," Luke said as he guided Ashton onto a stool he assumed was part of the drum kit. If he was being perfectly honest, he didn't know anything about drumming at all and he was suddenly nervous that he would embarrass himself which at this point seemed inevitable.

Luke gently gripped his wrist, opening his hands and placing what he could feel were the drums sticks in his grasp. He swallowed a little nervously and Luke probably heard because he assured him that it would be fine and there was no way he would be a professional on his first try.

"Okay, go for it," Luke said excitedly, grabbing Ashton by the shoulders and turning him so that he faced the drum kit correctly.

"What do I do?" Ashton whispered, his grip on the drumsticks turning a little sweaty.

"Well, it's getting late so I just want you to have a feel for what it's like so just play around with the instrument," Luke told him and Ashton nodded a little timidly but tried to instil some confidence in himself.

Ashton lifted the drumstick above his head and took a deep breath before bringing it down forcefully on the drum. He, however, accidently ended up hitting the frame of the bass drum instead of the high tom which he had originally hoped to hit. The drum stick cluttered out of his hand and on to the floor and Ashton cringed, lowering his head as his face flushed red in embarrassment.

He heard Luke stifling laughter behind him and he pouted a little, lowering his head further so that Luke wouldn't see his blush which at this point probably made him resemble a tomato more than anything else. He nervously pushed his glasses up his face and fiddled with his fingers.

"Right well, we'll work on that," Luke said, clearing his throat in an attempt to stop himself from laughing. Ashton nodded as Luke placed the fallen drumstick back in his hand.

"This time, try hit the drum okay?" Luke joked. Ashton forced out a chuckle to match Luke's but his face flushed again and he shifted nervously in his seat, not even sure he wanted to try again.

Ashton put both drum sticks in his left hand and reached forward with his right hand to try feel the drum kit a little so he at least knew where to hit. He immediately felt the bass drum in front of him, further up being the high tom. He nodded to himself once having an idea and felt a little more confident as he settled back on the stool.

He was about to make another go for it when he felt guilt and shame through the bond, strong enough to be obviously felt by Ashton.

"What's wrong, Lukey?" Ashton asked, confused as to where the sudden emotion came from.

"Why the fuck are you even with me? I'm terrible," Luke groaned. Ashton frowned in confusion, turning his body in the direction of Luke's voice.

"Wha-"

"I forgot! I'm such a dick!" Luke groaned louder and Ashton had never been more lost than he was at this point.

"Luke, what are you talking about?" Ashton demanded a little forcefully now because Luke was taking so long to get to the point that it was frustrating.

"I forgot you couldn't see the drum kit properly and I laughed at you. I'm your boyfriend, how the hell can I forget these things? And you were so nervous about playing and I'm here laughing and I'm just the biggest shit-"

"Lukey, it's okay," Ashton said softly because it was. Even if he'd felt embarrassed to be laughed at, he liked that he sometimes forgot because it meant that it wasn't the main thing Luke thought about.

"Still, I'm sorry baby," Luke whispered. Ashton shivered as he felt Luke softly press his face into the side of his neck placing a soft kiss there. His breathing hitched a little at the contact but he tried to act unfazed.

"You want to try again?" Luke said softly and Ashton nodded a little as Luke drew back. He lifted the drum stick back in the air and brought it down to where he felt the high tom being. To his relief, the drum stick hit it and he broke out into a large grin, turning to face Luke.

"Did you see that? I hit it, Lukey!" Ashton said excitedly. Luke cupped Ashton's cheeks and placed a gentle kiss to his forehead, making Ashton's face flush a little.

"Yeah I saw it, Ash. Well done," Luke said, and Ashton could hear the smile in Luke's voice making him smile wider.

Ashton was confused when Luke drew back. He could hear him walking a little further away and some shuffling before the scraping of a chair. When Luke got back to Ashton, there was cluttering behind him and he frowned, not knowing what was happening.

"Luke?" Ashton asked. He rotated in his seat to feel in front of him and felt a stool placed just behind his stool. Luke lifted Ashton's hand lightly before taking a seat on the chair he'd just placed. Luke gripped his waist, turning him back around to face the front and Ashton was glad because the grip on his waist made his face flush a little again and he didn't want Luke to see.

If his face was flushed before, it was nothing compared to when Luke shifted forward until Ashton's back was pressed right against Luke's chest. His breathing increased as Luke trailed his hands down Ashton's arms, touches so gentle it made goose bumps arise on Ashton's skin. Luke wrapped his hands around Ashton's which were still closed around each drum stick.

"I'll help you get a feel for the instrument the first time, okay?" Luke whispered in Ashton's ear and he shivered at the hot breath that fanned against the shell of his ear and nodded.

They spent the rest of the time in the music room with Luke guiding Ashton to each section of the drum kit, labelling each part and Luke explaining each section. Ashton tried not to be distracted by how close Luke was and how warm he felt but it was difficult and he often felt himself side-tracked by Luke's touch.

Soon enough Michael and Calum called saying they were waiting for them at the ice-cream parlour. After Luke put the stool back and they locked up the music class, they were on their way. Their hands were intertwined swinging softly between them as Ashton's other hand used the cane to assist his direction. He couldn't keep the smile off his face. With Luke everything felt like it would be okay.

Michael's booming voice was hard to miss as they entered the parlour and Ashton couldn't help giggling.

"Hey guys," Calum called out before Ashton felt warm arms embracing him. It was a little awkward hugging back because Luke refused to let go of his hand and the other hand holding the cane made it difficult but he smiled regardless.

The first person to hug him had obviously been Calum because the second person was talking loudly in his ear about pappadums and he recognised the voice as Michael's. He didn't understand why Michael was talking about Indian food in an ice-cream parlour but then again, there were a lot of things he didn't understand about Michael but it always made him smile regardless.

"Ashy, can I talk to you for a sec?" Michael asked once they were almost done with their ice-cream. Ashton's eyebrows furrowed in confusion but he nodded regardless. He got up slowly, holding on to the table in front of him to help himself get up. Michael linked arms with him and guided him outside, the cool night air making him shiver a little.

"What is it, Mikey?" Ashton asked, a little nervous of what the conversation could be.

"You and Luke are together now and I just want to make sure this is what you want. You didn't seem too keen on the idea for your own personal reasons and now you guys are dating? I'm just making sure this is what you want," Michael said and Ashton nodded because he understood why he would be confused.

"Well, after we got into a fight with the whole- the Aleisha thing we ran into each other in the mall and- and I guess I realised that if I let Luke date other people then I might lose him if he like, falls for someone else. If I tell him not to date anyone else I'd just be being selfish and either way it's unfair to him, you know?" Ashton mumbled a little.

"So you're telling me you got together with Luke, not because you're ready to date, but because you felt pressured to?" Michael said incredulously, voice firm. Ashton gulped a little.

"No, Mikey. I just- there's no point in waiting I guess. He's my soulmate and when we fought it hurt so bad to be separated from him for such a short amount of time that I just- I can't lose him," Ashton said, pleading with Michael to understand.

"If you didn't think it would work out before, what makes you think it'll work out now?" Michael asked angrily and Ashton didn't know how to answer that. All his reasons for wanting to wait came back but he couldn't tell Luke they couldn't date anymore. It would be unfair to him after finally agreeing.

"We're soulmates, Mikey. We'll work out."

"You know that's not always the case. There are tons of soulmate relationships that don't work out. I just want to make sure you're not making a mistake by rushing into things," Michael said more softly and Ashton faced down, fiddling with his fingers.

Michael sighed before linking their arms again and guiding them back to the table. Michael's words echoed in his head and he couldn't help but doubt their relationship. He knows Michael didn't mean to make him doubt, he was just making sure that he knew what he was doing.

Ashton was still incredibly insecure and thoughts of Aleisha and Luke often plagued his mind. He didn't know who he lacked trust in: Aleisha, Luke or their relationship. Lacking trust in Luke or their relationship could be seriously detrimental to their already timid status.

Ashton couldn't help but think to himself that if he was so sure about their relationship, he wouldn't have anything to doubt in the first place.

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