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I wasn't sure what time it was or where the hell Austin and I were walking to, but I couldn't stop the smile on my face as he held my hand tightly in his bigger one. Every once in a while as we walked, he would squeeze my hand or gently rub his thumb back and forth. He was quite affectionate and it drove me crazy.

It was really dark outside and cold. We were wandering in some part of the park that barely had any lights and looked almost dangerous to walk through, but Austin seemed like he knew where he was going and I trusted him- well I trusted him enough to know he wouldn't drag my body out here to bury it.

"Where are we going?" I asked for what was like the millionth time. He just gave me short answers that only fueled my curiosity.

"Shh, we're almost there." He said, I rolled my eyes and sighed. I didn't have enough time to grab my phone because this dummy was quickly pulling me from bed and telling me to dress warmly.

"You told me that thirty minutes ago." I said, he sighed and turned, kissing the side of my head.

"Just trust me, we really are almost there." He said softly, and that shut me right up. I just nodded and couldn't help it when my cheeks warmed up tremendously.

For another few minutes we walked until he came to a stop. I could barely see it, but it was there. It was an old looking bench, still somewhat in shape. He smiled at me and pulled my hand as he sat down.

"This is where my dad met my mom," he said softly, almost as if he could sense my confusion. "The park used to not be this big, and right here, my mom and dad first met. After she died and things were going bad with my dad and I ended up at the orphanage, I kept sneaking out, coming here for nights on end, wishing that just somehow she was back again and I was with her and my dad again." I grabbed his hand, resting my head on his shoulder.

"You'll be okay," I said, rubbing my thumb in circles on the back of his hand. "You'll always be okay because you're so strong." I told him, lifting my head and kissing his cheek.

"Only if you'll be okay with me," he said, tilting my chin and gently pressing a kiss to my lips. I hummed in agreement, kissing him back.

We pulled apart and smiled at each other. I once again rested my head on his shoulder, listening to him tell more stories about his childhood. He must've been so cute, more than he is today.

It wasn't until almost three am that Austin and I got back. I was tired and wanting to sleep, and by the looks of it, so did Austin. Once the front door was silently shut, we made our way upstairs. I headed to my room and Austin went to his, but not without sharing a sweet kiss that head my head spinning with emotions.

"Goodnight," he whispered softly.

"It's morning," I muttered, grinning. Austin rolled his eyes and pecked my forehead, whispering another goodnight before we parted. I sighed and went into the room, kicking off my shoes and removing my clothes, leaving me in my boxers before crawling into bed and pulling the covers over my head.

。。。

I woke up, looking around the room quickly as my heart pounded in my chest. I felt like I was being choked, like all the air in my legs just left me. I couldn't focus, my head spinning as I began to panic.

It happened again...the dreams. It felt so real...the punches and the kicks...all of it felt real and when I woke up, my body was slightly aching. I thought the dreams would have stopped by now, seeing as I haven't heard from my dad or seen him ever since the trial. I always had some kind of thought that in the middle of the neat he would come and steal me away, finish off what he couldn't that night. It may sound crazy, but he was crazy and could do almost anything...especially when drunk.

"Dude, are you okay?" Kellin looked at me from his bed. I sucked in air and nodded my head quickly. I was okay. I was okay. I am okay.

It repeated over and over again in my head as I pushed the covers back. I still felt like I couldn't breathe, I felt like I was suffocating with all the thoughts and it scared me, I was terrified.

"Are you sure?" Kellin asked, I nodded again quickly. I just needed to calm down. All of what happened was just a dream, a almost realistic dream. But I was okay.

I sucked in another deep breath and let it out, trying to calm my quickly beating heart. I almost hated myself, why couldn't I be normal for once? Why did these stupid dreams make me feel this way and why I was I so weak?

Kellin was still looking at me worrisome, he looked as if he wanted to ask more questions, but I wasn't in the mood for his interrogation. I climbed out of bed, needing to get away. I stumbled down the hallway, heading into the familiar room that was empty saved for the one person who was fast asleep, snoring softly. I climbed into his bed, curling underneath the covers just as his eyes slightly opened and he looked at me confused.

"What are you doing?" Austin asked in a groggy, sleepy voice. I shook my head and pulled his arms, making then wrap around me. I buried myself in his chest, taking in deep breaths. I'm okay.

Austin quickly held me close, kissing the top of my head. I hated him. I hated him so much. He was the only thing that somehow managed to make me feel sane and safe. I hated how I relied on him and how I was a burden, but he didn't seem to mind...it made me hate him even more.

"You're cold," he whispered softly, his hand running up and down my bare back. I didn't say anything, I kept my eyes closed and wished those stupid thoughts to go away.

I wanted to be okay. I wanted to be okay. I needed to be okay.

I fell asleep again, only this time peacefully. Stupid Austin and his comforting ways.

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